Resolutions

Word of the Year


I admit I have been spending months thinking about my word of the year.  Every time I thought of the word, engage, I thought, this is such a great word, the best word.  How will I ever think of a better word?  And yet I have come across a word that I feel is to be a fantastic word for me this year.  This word has many meanings.  They don't all apply but it works for me.  It is going to keep me FOCUSED.  It is going to keep me DEDICATED.  It is going to keep me BRAVE.

I have incredibly big goals this year.  Scary big.  The good kind of scary big.  I feel as though this is a turning point year and I'm ready to make a huge leap.  It means I am going to be saying YES to a lot of things that are really important to me and it is going to mean I have to say NO so many things too.

I will admit this past year, specifically the past few months, threw me for a loop.  It made me wonder if I was on the right path.  If my goals for myself and my family aligned best with what I thought of as my civic responsibility.  Was I doing enough?  Was I working for the greater good?  It made me throw myself into so many ventures that only now am I going through all of my commitments and actually figuring out what I can do.  Which leads me to my word of the year.

to bind or obligate, as by pledge or assurance; pledge.

to entrust, especially for safekeeping; commend.

When I set out for a goal I am going to COMMIT to that goal.  I will finish everything that I start this year.  If I don't think I can or if I don't want to finish it I won't start it.  Like I said, I might be saying NO more but it means that my YES will be stronger.  My YES will mean I am there 100 percent.  

This means I am going to be dedicated to my work and my business.  I am dedicated to watching it grow. I am dedicated to my customers and challengers.  I have serious goals and intentions for my business and I intend to see these goals reached.  I am committed to them.

Our family is complete.  This is the first year in a long time that I am sure of the next step.  There are 5 of us.  We are whole.  We are ready to move forward into the future as a family.  No more waiting for one more.  I am committed to both my role as a mother and committed to my role as a wife.

By choosing this word I am not just planning on thinking of this word each morning but also thinking of questions that I will ask throughout the year.  Can I commit to this?  By committing to this am I helping my pursuit to be my best self?  The best mother I can be.  The best wife I can be.  The best coach I can be.  

I am really excited to what can happen this year.  Thank you so much for sharing your word of the year.  I see big things for all of us this year!

Lets get to it!

2016: The year to be engaged.



In my dream world I would go to bed earlier to get up an hour before my kids.  I would spend a few minutes meditating, then reading, I would workout while listening to personal development.  I would make a cup of tea and drink it before the kids woke up.  Then, probably in my workout clothing I would be ready to go and face the day with a positive and energetic attitude when the kids wake up.

In my reality world I go to bed too late just about every night so excited to get those extra few minutes at night kidless.  I'm sucked into books, projects or television shows with my husband.  I wake up as I hear the bedroom door open, frankly I usually wake up before then and wait to hear the bedroom door open.  At that point I grab my glasses and try to get whichever kid woke up first to go back to sleep or at least stay quiet enough as not to wake the other kiddo.  I have about 1.5 seconds to warm up from sleep to Ready-to-go Mom and Girl Boss.  I've decided that I needed a mantra or a word that would get me in the mindset that the extra hour of me time would give.  One word to focus me for the day and get my head right.  

This proved to be more challenging than I thought it would be.  For starters I have a lot of goals and a lot of things I want to get done in 2016 and although they do work together they don't exactly fit into one word.  On one hand I want to work on being patient and calm with my kids.  I want to suck up each moment the best I can and enjoy the little special times we have together, both these little ones and the one on the way.  On the other hand I have big goals from a business perspective and want to be fierce and focused and make this a big year for our lives and our family.  I will be stepping out of my comfort zone and I will be aggressive and I am ready to go.

So you see my dilemma.  Is there really one word that can focus me to do those things both the first thing in the morning and all day long.  Finally I landed on the word engage.  As in pledge myself to that moment with my children.  Focus myself to the task at hand.  (The more I read the more it is evident to me that we can't really multitask.)  Give attention to my goals and the people on my team that I work closely.  To take part in things greater than myself.  

I want to be engaged.  Engage others.  Give attention.


He said, "Try to learn to breathe deeply, really to taste food when you eat, and when you sleep really to sleep.  Try as much as possible to be wholly alive with all your might and when you laugh, laugh like hell.  And when you get angry, get good and angry.  Try to be alive.  You will be dead soon enough." ― William Saroyan

Let's Review

Before I present my To-Do List for 2016 I wanted to evaluate my To-Do List for last year.  I like to make 3 month goals, 6 month goals, 9 month goals and 12 month goals.  I also do 3 year and 5 year goals.  Last year was a tough one with the long term goals because we didn't know if we would go for Baby no. 3 and my husband had a drop he didn't love and we knew a change was coming.  Now those things are a bit more settled I am really excited to get these goals on paper.  Before I do that though I need to evaluate how I did last year and what might need to be added for next year!  

Complete 2 Half marathons, 1 15k, 3 5ks, 1 10k  (All but the 10k are on the calendar.)-  Okay, I did 1 15k, 1 half marathon, 2 5ks...then I got pregnant.  Its not an excuse for everyone but its an excuse for me.  
Complete 21 Day Fix Extreme and Insanity Max 30- Done and Done!
Run 730 miles.- Sort of lost count and of course, I've lost the last two months with no running.  I have walked a lot I just don't have a way to keep track.
Walk 10,000 steps per day.- Working on it every day and will continue this in 2016.

Use all of my volunteer/pro bono days at work.- I only used 1.5 hours so this is once again on the to do list for 2016.
Involve my family in 1 community service project per month.- I need to sit down and make a list to see if we've reached this goal but I do not that we have kept this in our focus and for the month of December the Advent Calendar Countdown with Kindness was a huge bonus.  

Incorporate essential oils into our families lives, at the very least into cleaning supplies.- I know what I want and I just need to buy it. 
Create a dream board.- This was never made so its on the to do list for 2016 but that being said I have started working on it and I've begun making a list of what I want on it.  
Incorporate meditation into my daily routine.- Mediation is not part of my daily routine but it has become a small part of my life.  Still working on it. Gratitude has become a part of my daily routine and that has changed everything. 

Take better care of my skin, specifically, hands, face, and neck- Started using Derm Exclusive.

Organize boys memory boxes.- Check!
Update the baby books,- I'm giving myself to the 4th...must check this off.
Make the following photo books:  Alexander year 1, Year of 2014, Honeymoon, European vacation.- All but the European vacation is done!  Photos organized for 2015 as well.  
Organizing filing- About 75% of the way there.   

Start playing the oboe again- :( 

Complete Pop Sugar Reading Challenge- No and what I realized is that this has been too complicated.  I'll be re-evaluating a goal like this for 2016.  
10 minutes of Personal Development Each Day- Yes!  This has been amazing!
Complete nutrition/diet courses.- Yes!!!
Learn how to take good photos of the family with more than just an iPhone.- Nope. :(
Be consistent with posting on this very blog more often.- Yes!  (As evidenced by this post.)

On a side note, these are my personal goals.  My professional goals and financial goals will be in another post when I talk more about my dream board...or when I figure them out.  Well okay, here are a few.


Take my Beachbody business to the next level (One Star Diamond) by continuing to help others.- Yes!  I made it with two weeks to spare. 
Evaluate my current job to make sure I find it fulfilling.- Yes!
Pay off Private Law School loans.- Yes!
Figure out where the extra payment from the law school loans should go.- No but I finally have a budget I'm following.
Incorporate Dave Ramsey's Plan into our house.- Using Mint and some online sources to start this.

And the race is on...Ready Set Go!

35 Quotes That Will Help Set Your Weeks Intentions

I tend do view the Tuesday after Labor Day as my last chance to get moving on my New Year's resolutions if I really want to get them finished.  There is a little more than a quarter left in the year, so really there is plenty of time.  What's a to-do list without a a deadline.  Just a wish list if you ask me.  Time to do a re-evaluation of my list and see how I've done so far.

Complete 2 Half marathons, 1 15k, 3 5ks, 1 10k  (All but the 10k are on the calendar.)-  Okay, I did 1 15k, 1 half marathon, 1 5k and I'm hoping to do one more. 
Complete 21 Day Fix Extreme and Insanity Max 30- Done and Done!
Run 730 miles.- Sort of lost count and of course, I've lost the last two months with no running.
Walk 10,000 steps per day.- Working on it every day!

Use all of my volunteer/pro bono days at work.- I've used one half of one which means I still have 3.5 left.  I better get to it.   
Involve my family in 1 community service project per month.- I haven't done one project per month but I we have been pretty active and we' still have a lot planned for the year. 

Incorporate essential oils into our families lives, at the very least into cleaning supplies.- I was gung ho about this at the beginning of the year and I need to get back on the horse. 
Create a dream board.- So may parts of a dream board but no dream board. 
Incorporate meditation into my daily routine.- Mediation is not part of my daily routine but it has become a small part of my life.  Still working on it. 

Take better care of my skin, specifically, hands, face, and neck- Slowly but surely.

Organize boys memory boxes.- Check!
Update the baby books,- Oh no.  This would take me one afternoon...now just to find that one afternoon.
Make the following photo books:  Alexander year 1, Year of 2014, Honeymoon, European vacation.- Uh-oh.  Better get moving on this. 
Organizing filing- No but as of two days ago I got my second filing cabinet in two weeks so I am on my way.  

Start playing the oboe again- Totally forgot this was on my to do list.  

Complete Pop Sugar Reading Challenge- I've sort of changed my goal to just read all the books at the Verona Library book sale.  I'm not too bad but I better turn off the computer and get reading. 
10 minutes of Personal Development Each Day- Yes!  This has been amazing!
Complete nutrition/diet courses.- No and this is my biggest concern.  I need to figure out how much time I need to complete these courses and how many hours per week I need to devote to this.  
Learn how to take good photos of the family with more than just an iPhone.- Nope. :(
Be consistent with posting on this very blog more often.- Yes!  (As evidenced by this post.)

On a side note, these are my personal goals.  My professional goals and financial goals will be in another post when I talk more about my dream board...or when I figure them out.  Well okay, here are a few.

Take my Beachbody business to the next level (One Star Diamond) by continuing to help others.- On track! But should this goal be bigger?
Evaluate my current job to make sure I find it fulfilling.- Yes!
Pay off Private Law School loans.- Yes!
Figure out where the extra payment from the law school loans should go.- No I've just been enjoying not cutting it so close but this money needs to be given more purpose.  (Like paying off those government loans.)
Incorporate Dave Ramsey's Plan into our house.- Baby steps but want to have a big game plan before the end of the year.

Okay, so this wasn't so bad after all.  I still have a lot to do but nothing a few focused afternoons home without kids can't fix.  I am so glad I took this time to refocus and I'm not waiting until the last minute.

How are your resolutions coming along?

Goals...Just some dreams but with steps


Oh my goodness.  How did it get to be the end of January already I haven't even made my goals official?  This year I have big plans, mainly because last year I had big plans and by putting them out there I actually reached so many of those goals.  It was sort of amazing.  Last year was the first year that instead of just saying something like "I want to be more healthy" or even "I will run more" I actually laid out plans and made a to-do list.  I started super big, and broad with my thoughts and then just made them more specific with steps.  So without further adieu, in no particular order, although bunched together in the way my mind works, here are my goals for this year.

Complete 2 Half marathons, 1 15k, 3 5ks, 1 10k  (All but the 10k are on the calendar.)
Complete 21 Day Fix Extreme and Insanity Max 30
Run 730 miles.
Walk 10,000 steps per day.

Use all of my volunteer/pro bono days at work.  
Involve my family in 1 community service project per month.  

Incorporate essential oils into our families lives, at the very least into cleaning supplies.
Create a dream board.
Incorporate meditation into my daily routine.  

Take better care of my skin, specifically, hands, face, and neck

Organize boys memory boxes.
Update the baby books,
Make the following photo books:  Alexander year 1, Year of 2014, Honeymoon, European vacation.
Organizing filing,

Start playing the oboe again

10 minutes of Personal Development Each Day
Complete nutrition/diet courses.
Learn how to take good photos of the family with more than just an iPhone.
Be consistent with posting on this very blog more often.

On a side note, these are my personal goals.  My professional goals and financial goals will be in another post when I talk more about my dream board...or when I figure them out.  Well okay, here are a few.


Take my Beachbody business to the next level (One Star Diamond) by continuing to help others.
Evaluate my current job to make sure I find it fulfilling. 
Pay off Private Law School loans.
Figure out where the extra payment from the law school loans should go.
Incorporate Dave Ramsey's Plan into our house.

I give up.

A trip to Nantucket in 2006.

I'm not much of a quitter.  In fact, other than transferring schools in college (which isn't technically quitting), I don't quit.  I don't give up.  Until now.  Now, I give up.  I give up on trying to get my body "back".  There is so much talk everywhere, all day long, about women getting their body back after they have a child.  As if it went somewhere.  As if I lost my body somewhere along the way.

Well, if Jennifer Garner can say it, I can say it too.  This is my body.  Time to get used to it.  That's not to say that I'm just going to sit on the couch and eat bonbons (you know, cause I have all this time to do that.)  Its not to say that I'm going to stop exercising.  I'm just telling the world (and myself) that I'm not eating healthy or exercising to get my body back.  I give up.  

The fact is that I give up, because I don't want it back.  Don't get me wrong, that body was pretty awesome.  It could get me down a double black diamond ski trail.  It could participate in a few triathlons.  It could even run a few marathons.  What that body couldn't do, or what I wasn't sure if it could do, was have a baby.  For some reason, I always feared that I wouldn't be able to have a baby.  It was one thing in my life that always wanted.  So while that body was a pretty phenomenal body its nothing compared with the one that I have now.

7 months with Baby no. 2 (courtesy of Ronice Kay Photography)
I know not everyone wants to have a baby.  And this isn't to say anything about that.  Instead this is to just address me, worrying about getting into my pre-baby jeans.  This is to address myself who looks into the mirror with shame.  I'm done, I give up.

Instead I choose to exercise because I want to be stronger than I am today.  I want to be healthier than I am today.  I turn on a work out video with my two boys playing at my feet each morning so that they can see healthy habits.  I push them in a stroller day in and day out so I can run races, and so we can spend time outside together.  I eat healthy and my family eats healthy so we are all around for a nice long time.

Taken a few months ago as a "before" photo.  Let's be honest.  This is really an "after" photo.
Do I want to get back in my old clothing so I can avoid buying a whole new wardrobe?  Of course.  Do I care if I am the size I was in high school?  Of course not.  That high school body was good to me,but this body I have now is spectacular and I will no longer disrespect it by trying to get back to the old one.  

That's right.  I respect the strength and power of my current body.  I might not love the extra skin, or stretch marks but I love what they prove.  They are proof that this body of mine grew, housed and nourished two little boys for many, many weeks.  (Yes more than 40 for both of them.)  This amazing body of mine was able to do amazing things and I will not disrespect those who cannot do those things anymore, by lamenting over it.

I am awed by this body.  I have seen what it has already accomplished.  I can't wait to see what it can do in the future now that I know its strength.  I don't want my old body back.  I give up.

During a run.  A selfie. At this point most of my photos have two other little people in them. 

My Monthly Goals/To-do List

How do you set goals?  What do you?  We are 5 months into the year already.  Can you believe it?  That means we have had 5 months to reach our New Years resolutions.  How many have you completed?  How many have you kept up?  Are you still doing what you said you are going to do?



I'm all for goals.  I love them.  They are like big to-do lists and I LOVE to-do lists.  Nothing is as satisfying to me as checking something off my lists.  But resolutions put this weird focus on timing and sometimes I think we put other peoples ideas of what our goals should be rather than our own.  You know, pay off debt, lose weight, etc.  While that is often my goals the cliche of it at the new year steals some of the fun.  I also like my goals to be very specific.  Not just lose weight, but get fit, get healthy and do that by completely X work out program.

This was my 2014 To-do List.

  1. Complete T25.
  2. Complete P90X3.
  3. Complete a combo work out of T25/P90X3
  4. Run a Labor Day 5k.
  5. Run the Walk for Wishes in October.
  6. Run the Beauty and the Beach 5 miler in November.
  7. Read the following: Passage to India, Beloved, Team of Rivals, The Good Earth.  (All books I've started and haven't finished.
  8. Continue to pay down loans and debt without creating new debt.
  9. Write more.  

These are great resolutions.  In fact I've already crossed the first one off the list and I'm actively (as I type this) working on the 9th.  But these resolutions are short sited.  Since I wrote this list, I have returned to work from maternity leave, started a new business venture, signed up for another 5k (in two weeks, wish me luck!) and added a number of books to my list.  I've also added a bunch of other personal development goals.  This list just doesn't do the trick.

Recently I had the opportunity to be part of an organizing challenge lead by Morgan from www.morganizewithme.com  It was a fantastic experience and while I learned many things, one of my favorite tips I noticed was setting monthly goals.  Not just monthly goals in our heads but ones I write down and post next to my bed.  This practice is something I can get my head around.  Goals written down are more successful than goals you keep in your head.  Goals you tell your friends are even better.

With that in mind, here is my to do list for the month of June.


  1. Complete The Valerie Fund 5k
  2. Continue eating a clean, dairy free, grain free, sugar free diet.  
  3. Complete reading one (just one) of the above books.
  4. Complete reading one of my personal development books.
  5. Some personal matters- get the family dental appointments scheduled.  (not exciting, but necessary)
  6. Continue to write, write, write.  Both here and on our Healthy Living Facebook page.  
  7. Fill my freezer!  

That seems like enough to keep me busy.  Of course, I have weekly and daily goals (make the bed!) but these are for another day.  For now, it is June 1st and I have written down my goals and shared them.  I'm halfway there.

What is on your to-do list for the month of June?

- Tovah