A trip to Nantucket in 2006.

I'm not much of a quitter. In fact, other than transferring schools in college (which isn't technically quitting), I don't quit. I don't give up. Until now. Now, I give up. I give up on trying to get my body "back". There is so much talk everywhere, all day long, about women getting their body back after they have a child. As if it went somewhere. As if I lost my body somewhere along the way.

Well, if Jennifer Garner can say it, I can say it too. This is my body. Time to get used to it. That's not to say that I'm just going to sit on the couch and eat bonbons (you know, cause I have all this time to do that.) Its not to say that I'm going to stop exercising. I'm just telling the world (and myself) that I'm not eating healthy or exercising to get my body back. I give up.

The fact is that I give up, because I don't want it back. Don't get me wrong, that body was pretty awesome. It could get me down a double black diamond ski trail. It could participate in a few triathlons. It could even run a few marathons. What that body couldn't do, or what I wasn't sure if it could do, was have a baby. For some reason, I always feared that I wouldn't be able to have a baby. It was one thing in my life that always wanted. So while that body was a pretty phenomenal body its nothing compared with the one that I have now.

7 months with Baby no. 2 (courtesy of Ronice Kay Photography)

I know not everyone wants to have a baby. And this isn't to say anything about that. Instead this is to just address me, worrying about getting into my pre-baby jeans. This is to address myself who looks into the mirror with shame. I'm done, I give up.

Instead I choose to exercise because I want to be stronger than I am today. I want to be healthier than I am today. I turn on a work out video with my two boys playing at my feet each morning so that they can see healthy habits. I push them in a stroller day in and day out so I can run races, and so we can spend time outside together. I eat healthy and my family eats healthy so we are all around for a nice long time.

Taken a few months ago as a "before" photo. Let's be honest. This is really an "after" photo.

Do I want to get back in my old clothing so I can avoid buying a whole new wardrobe? Of course. Do I care if I am the size I was in high school? Of course not. That high school body was good to me,but this body I have now is spectacular and I will no longer disrespect it by trying to get back to the old one.

That's right. I respect the strength and power of my current body. I might not love the extra skin, or stretch marks but I love what they prove. They are proof that this body of mine grew, housed and nourished two little boys for many, many weeks. (Yes more than 40 for both of them.) This amazing body of mine was able to do amazing things and I will not disrespect those who cannot do those things anymore, by lamenting over it.

I am awed by this body. I have seen what it has already accomplished. I can't wait to see what it can do in the future now that I know its strength. I don't want my old body back. I give up.

During a run. A selfie. At this point most of my photos have two other little people in them.