My 2016 To-do List

Okay, this is beyond embarrassing.  I'm miss, set goals, gof or it and it is March 1st and I still haven't written all of my goals down and I started this before January 1st.  Aaaahhh....so back where I started.

This to do list is particularly exciting for me to put together.  Last year I was a little lost when it came to this sort of thing.  My husband wasn't overly happy with his occupation and we were sort of waiting for the other shoe to drop to see what what happened.  We were also undecided as to whether we were going to go for a third child.  So as much as I loved 2015's to do list it was a little sketchy.  This year however is launching us into the new world.  My husband has started his own general contracting business and we're expecting our third child in any day now.  

(One of the reasons that I was dragging my feet on this was simply because I couldn't figure out how to organize it...duh.  Just do it.  Its a to-do list for heaven's sake.)

Focus on: 
Be Mindful of Sleep
Practice patience, with meditation
Integrate EO into cleaning and immune
Be Mindful of my body as a strong vessel that carries babies, feeds them and can be strong
Be Mindful of Food as Fuel

Organize drawings/pictures by kids
Put grandmother's recipes into cookbook
Start playing music again- As in the oboe. 
Learn how to use a real camera, get a real camera.  Take on line course in photography.  
Finish hanging things in the house
Renovate kitchen
Organize photos (specifically, photo albums, discs, etc.)
Implement use of Passion Planner

Complete the following:
Instagram Impact
Chalene's Push
John Maxwell Leadership Group
Franklin Covey Course
Know Myself Better
De-Clutter My Life
Cope with a Difficult Person
Quit Yelling at My Kids
The Relationship Challenge
Take a Camera Course
Workshop with Cara
Workshop with Gabrielle, Miracles

Read 40 books

Business goals:
$1000 per week
5 star Diamond
2 coaches per month
Move Nick to Diamond 
Circle of Excellence
Pay down debt (I've written these specific goals for myself)
Hire a cleaning lady by years end
Monthly pedicures

Fitness goals:
Complete PiYo
Complete Hammer and Chissel
Complete 22 Minute Hard Corp
Complete 3 5k races
Complete 1 5 mile/10k race
Complete RW Half Marathon
Certify as PiYo Instructor
Average 10,000 steps per day (Post baby)

Share a Knowing Smile and Keep Living

“Mother is not a title. Mother is a verb. It is not who you are. It’s what you do.” – Shonda Rhimes

I've been meaning to write this for months and months.  The seed was planted in my mind after having a conversation with a friend about how hard it was for her as a stay at home mom and the fact that her husband didn't totally respect what it took for her to do it all.  It was pretty obvious from my outside looking in perspective, that she would have been able to do his job, as a well educated experience woman, but he might not be able to do her job so easily.  I spent an evening giving her a pep talk.  Me, the working mom, was giving a pep talk to the stay at home mom.   According to the media working moms and stay at home moms shouldn't be supporting each other.  The fact is however that we're both moms and being a mom is hard whether you are "working" or "staying at home".  Both terms, by the way, are totally absurd.  As if someone who works outside the home works more or harder than a "stay at home" mom and the fact is I don't really know any "stay at home" moms who actually stay at home.

Like I said, I've been meaning to write this post for months but it finally took listening to Shonda Rhimes' book "The Year of Yes" to get me to sit down and write it.  That and reading a few other blog posts have inspired me to write my own commentary on the Mommy Wars.  So here it goes...

I think the mommy war is made up by someone.  I'm not going to blame the "mainstream media" because I don't know that its their fault.  I don't know who made up this idea of the mommy wars but I just don't believe it.  The fact is that I don't know any mothers that have enough time or energy to resent other mothers.  Maybe themselves.  Maybe they get frustrated, angry and resentful toward themselves but other mothers, not so much.  I suppose that's not entirely true.  I've heard of people being stressed by the pressure of Pinterest which I guess in its own way is a mommy war but that's really the crafty v. the non crafty right?  Not really "working" moms v. "stay at home" moms.

I don't know where this mommy war thing came from but I have my theories.  I think its about a generation old.  I think it started with our moms where there were women who fought the good fight for feminism and went out and got jobs.  There were women that didn't.  Of course that didn't make them any less feminists.  It didn't make the women who got jobs any less moms.  It did set them both up for a nice amount of resentment.

The fact of the matter is that it is hard being a working mom.  Or a work outside the home mom.  It is hard being a work at home mom.  It is just hard being a mom.  Those tiny humans are pretty much crazy.  It is hard being a mom and it is hard being a woman.  Whether you have children or not it is hard to be a woman.  Either way you're "punished" for just being a woman by making less money and being questioned constantly as to whether you will have kids or not or whether or not you will have more kids.  It is hard being a person.  Life is hard and we don't have time to worry about who has it harder.  Being a person is hard.  Being a mom is hard.

I listened to Shonda Rhimes and she called for an end to the mommy wars.  That we all should stop judging each other.  That we shouldn't assume that just because we are on "different sides"  doesn't mean we are on opposite sides.  We're really all in the trenches together.  I'd like to take it a step farther though.  Let's just not stop the judgment of others, lets stop the judgment of ourselves and lets support each other!

When my kids have a party at school I like to sign up to bring cookies.  Not store bought cookies but homemade cookies.  This is not because I think I am better than other moms.  This is simply because I like to bake cookies.  It was a fun thing my Dad and I did growing up and now its a fun thing to do with my kids.  Its an activity to pass the time.  I don't get fancy.  I do drop cookies because that's what I can make.  They like it, I like it, we're all happy.  If I don't sign up for the cookies I don't care if the person who does brings store bought cookies.  It really doesn't matter.  No judgment.  What I of course need to work on is not judging myself if I buy the store bought cookies.  I'm not competing against anyone but myself and perhaps I need to realize its not a competition.  And I think there in lies the problem.  The mommy guilt.  The mommy guilt we put on ourselves so much so that we assume other people care as much as we do about what we do.  I'll let you in on a little secret.  They don't.  We care if we bake homemade cookies or store bought (or maybe you don't but I guess you care about something else).  If you think that someone else is judging you in all likelihood are judging yourself.  Just let it go.  Let go of the judgment of yourself and assume that others are supporting you.  The fact is that they probably are. 

So I don't know where the mommy wars came from but I do have a feeling that mostly its a war against ourselves that we cast onto others.  Women need to support women.  Whether the women are mothers or not and whether the mothers work at home or out of the house.  Let's just celebrate, each other.  And if you're too tired to celebrate perhaps we just share some knowing smiles and keep living. 

Setting goals! Making Vision Boards!

Did you miss our vision board party?  Don't worry!  Here are the steps that I outlined at the party for how to approach your vision board.  Its not a complete list but it is a good place start.

Tell me.  Do you use a vision board to help you focus on your goals and meet your goals?

If not, what's holding you back?  

Tip one: Figure out what you want your vision board to be. Inspiration. Goal centric. A combo.

For example I'm going to include all three of these visuals. I want to drink more water. I want to practice finding joy (which goes with my word of the year: engage). I want to take the worry away from money by being fiscally responsible AND increasing my income.

 Tip 2: Be specific.

The genius of a vision board is that (a) you are putting your wishes out to the universe but also (b) you are reminding yourself. The more specific the better.

How are you supposed to get exactly what you want if you don't know what that is?

Tip 3: Stay focused.

As you lay out your board it may be helpful to do it in bunches so you can look at one spot and be focused.

Tip 4:  When is your vision board focused on?

Figure out the time frame for your board. I like to keep mine focused for the next year but I do come across photos that are part of my 5 year plan that may happen on this board or go to a notebook I have to use later.

The photos on the left are for a new kitchen we are going to renovate in our house this year. The photos on the right have to do with my dream house entry way.

Tip 5: Be free!

There is no wrong way to do a vision board. Don't limit yourself. If magazines don't do the trick write your own. Glitter is fun. This is yours. Be proud. Be confident. Put the vision board out and look at it daily!

(Its still a work in progress but I'm so excited to get as far as this!)

Do you have tips that I'm missing?  Share them with us!

Why I am a Beachbody Coach

Today I had the chance to sit in a room with 1000 other Beachbody coaches and listen to the CEO of Beachbody speak.  He spent about 20 minutes as to what is important this month and every month when you are a Beachbody Coach.  He talked about what differentiates Beachbody from other companies and he said some magic words that stuck with me.  Before he spoke though the group of us, all in unison, stated the Beachbody mission.  I'll be honest, and slightly embarrassed, that I did not know the Beachbdoy mission statement or that there even was one.  (I mean of course there was one but I never though about it.)

"Help people achieve their goals and enjoy healthy, fulfilling lives."

I said it for the first time today and realized, hey, wait, that's what I do.  That's my goal.  To help people achieve their goals and enjoy healthy, fulfilling lives.  It made me really think more about why I do that.  Why I am a Beachbody coach.  Why I'm willing to stay up late.  Get up early.  Put myself in uncomfortable positions.  All for Beachbody.  The fact is though its not all for Beachbody.  Its all for my family.  Its all for my friends.  Its all for you.  

So here they.  The reasons I'm a Beachbody coach and why its made my life better.

1.  Being healthy is hard.  Getting healthy, staying healthy, living healthy is hard.  
2.  Doing something with other people is easier.  Doing anything with other people is easier.  Eating junk food is more fun but so is exercising.  So is eating healthy.  Yes, its actually more fun to eat healthy with other people.  
3.  Being held accountable by other people, whether they are participating with me or not, keeps me focused.  
4.  Helping other people, friends, families, strangers, reach their personal goals is inspiring and encouraging and keeps me moving when I want to stop. 
5.  Building a life for my family beyond just following the rules of a traditional gives me hope and stops me from worrying about the future.  
6.  Its scary.  That's right.  It is uncomfortable and scary and that's good.
7.  I am not satisfied with who I am right now.  I want to be the best version of myself.  
8.   I have kids.  That's right.  These little people aren't a reason not to push my reason they are a reason to push myself.  
  
So those are my reasons right now.  They've changed.  They've evolved.  I hope they continue to do so.  

My question to you is, what are you doing to ensure that you are the best version of yourself? 

A To-do List for My Subconscious

I have read over and over again that writing your goals/resolutions down make them more likely to be achieved.  Even better, telling someone else will help you accomplish those goals.  This is why people keep journals and create dream boards.  Like I said, I have read this over and over again.  Its all about visualizing what you want and then getting it.  Whether you are consciously working towards your goals or not, your subconscious is...as long as it knows what you want.  The purpose is to fill your subconscious with positive thoughts, goals and images.  Writing your goals down, making a dream board, these are tangible representations of where you want to go.

Well, I "know" all this, but I must say I have never really, completely bought into this theory.  Until a few days ago that is.  A few days ago I was rereading an old journal (Have you ever done that?  Very humbling, and pretty funny.)  This particular journal focused on my husband and my honeymoon to Australia.  I was simply reading it to find out the places we ate at so I could make suggestions to a friend traveling to Australia.  It was all well and good until I came across this statement:

"For me, Lizard Island and Australia, made me want to take better care of my whole self, both inside and out.  Listen to more music- do tai chi and yoga, eat healthier.  Less concern about calories and more about healthy food.  

I am also more interested in finding a fulfilling job.  Law, yes, but a different, better kind of law."

So this is what I was thinking and what I wrote down on November 1,2008,  I don't know that when I went back to work and home that I was actively reaching these goals.  In fact, I went back to work and eventually changed jobs to a position that was decidedly not more fulfilling and my focus moved not toward me but to starting a family.  All along, my subconscious has been working because as of today I do in fact have a much more fulfilling job.  A job I love in fact.  And not just my day job, but my time spent as beachbody coach helps me live a healthier life.  I might not be as thin as I was but I am healthier.  No more sweetners in my life.  I focus on eating whole foods for both my family and myself.  We live a greener life, with the main cleaner in our house being vinegar vs. chemicals.  I pay attention to what comes into my home, perhaps because of the little people who also inhabit it but the result is the same.  We do live healthier lives.  As we speak, my work out program is a combination of yoga and running.  And yes, I do listen to more music.  (My little buddies are huge music fans.)

Perhaps it took 6 years, but for those last 6 years my subconscious has been quite busy.  If writing a random comment in my journal could do so much what would some focused writing do?  What would, dare I say, a dream board do?  I suppose there is only one way to find out.  If you're looking for me this weekend, I'll be the one cutting pictures out of magazines, making a to do list for my subconscious.  

Motivational Monday: What are your goals for the week?

Each Monday I set out to reach new goals for the week.  Some are small, simple goals and some are large goals that must be completed this week.  Different goals have different purposes for my life and famliy and thus different effects on my life and family.  No matter what the goals,  I take inspiration from the words of others.  What are words that inspire you?